Removing Bolts from my shoulder
in DECEMBER 2006 on the 25th actually i suffer a bi-shoulder dislocation .. both of my shoulders dislocated simultaneously upward (to front) and broke the leverage that holds the shoulder bone from going forward, what my case really weird are 2 things, first usually shoulders get dislocated toward the back not toward the chest, second they “doctors and specialists” still don’t know what broke my shoulders
i wrote this article about a year ago (last aug. 2007) .. when i was scheduled to remove the bolts that got installed in me few months ago .. i was so pissed, typing with one hand, standing, i’veth systems in Kuwait SUCKS! .. and i divided the articles into days .. i was adding pissed crazy thoughts every day prior and after the removal operation
Day 1 Addmision day:
couldn’t imagine that heali was up all night anxious about the stupid indian nurses might take some wrong turn somewhere and screw my diabetes up .. which is really happened .. had to call my physician and he was out of the country the other dumb ass physician (my cool doctor substitute) told them to unplug my insulin pump, WTF!. he was afraid to take the responsibility, he did .. when i called again he didnt pick up i called like 10 times he still didn’t call back .. at the admission desk, a lazy old indian male nurse (the slowest man on earth) he was like .. who’s da patient?? DUH im right in front of you wrapped like a mummy who do you think it is?
he goes oooooooooooooooh (very long one) you are so younggggg with think eastern madry south indnian accent .. i was like ok whats next .. he wrapped my medical history and gave a 70s indian movie scene .. you are tttooo youngg, how come, oh mhy GgooDDD you broke your shoulders tssk tssk, then i was like can i have my file please and the slow fuck was still tssking with other nurses .. i ran to my doctor and i told him you gotta move me from there man please i beg you :`( ..patients are throwing up .. i was throwing up with them i call that period compassion throw ups
then i found out a cool wa96a person always showing up at 9 (her shift starts at 7.30) then she had a breakfast for like an hour .. then she called some one who knew some one who killed someone who miss treated someone and who knew someone and got me a private room YAAAY an end of an ERA .. i was like cool being an ass is awesome i should be one … nurses and doctors coming and going i keep telling them about my mp3 player (my insulin pump) i had 7 nurses coming in i was teaching them how inject my self what are my doses (short active) what is my day long dose (long active) so they can monitor me .. i gave them a 30 minutes class for almost 2 entire shifts of nurses .. then they go like “oh we so sorry we will use our methods” (bastards!!!)
day2 Operation day:
some old indian bitch walked in at 4 am i was like, haaa what happened am i dead .. she goes like “yalla habeebi strip up” i was thinking i pitty your boyfriend, if you had one, i think she is gay no man could end ep with her, unless he i blind and deph and has no sense of smelling, i should find her one .. i was like what the hell its still dark then i thought well maybe a change in plan .. the doctor wanna do my operation now .. COOL .. only not .. i was playing along (no tease playing goingwith their flow you sick people 
) so i was wearing the half naked thingy and a head cap, and it was like cold air, coming from every where by 4:15 i was ready .. im still like green nurses will walk in any minute .. cant wait to go to the big lights room.. and then
i asked innocently, when is my operation .. then the old bitch yelled its nottt nowwww its on 11:00 .. again WTF .. i was like why are you yelling .. she slammed the door .. was she able to hear me talking to my self .. or was she really really frustrated coz i already shaved my under arms and other places where the sun dont shine at home .. couldn’t really tell .. ooookay .. i was instructed not to eat any thing after saturday midnight .. i was friggin starving i eat my nails my mom saw me she thought i was nervous .. :S so i started eating my lips one hot russian nurse thought i was making a move .. where is she by the way .. i’ll go look her up .. back she got transferred (Bummer!!) .. any waysss .. i was escorted to the OR by a pregnant nurse .. her tummy was huge i thought she gonna give birth on the way to BIG ROOM .. i told her if you give birth right now we’ll be OR mates 
.. call your son NOTHAPPY because he is born in this hospital and when he grow up no will bitch about him being a grumpy old man .. i was making jokes, all the way, silly ones of course .. she was laughing so hard she wet her self .. DAM .. then waited like 10 minutes then the old indian bitch showed up .. she was pushing the stretcher so fast i had to get up and act as if we were racing .. a lill guy half naked covered all green racing down the corridors in RAZI hospital .. my mom was half crying half laughing ..
in the OR room .. i was like dam its cold in here “people get me some blanket im half naked” .. then my doctor said its not .. you are naked .. mashalla he is smart, i just said that .. some nurse wannabe computer geek .. common you are an IT guy server rooms are always cold, i screamed at him “WALLA IL3ATHEEEEEEEM, i wanna see you naked in our servers room” ..to shut me up they masked me i asked for the time they were shutting me up, i saw it on the wall, i asked them to play some rap music i never got the answer .. i asked my anesthetic doctor .. can i have some for later use .. he gave me that cold look .. NO! .. then i yelled you people don’t know how to have fun .. got sedated .. walked in around 12:30 (i was half naked since 4:15 am) got out at 14:30 .. all of a sudden i woke up in the awakening zone and a nurse was just pulling my stretcher there .. i said hey take me to my room, i was thinking cheap tranquilizers .. i was yelling Doc.. that syrup sucks i dont even have a hang over .. i take it back i dont want it .. then i was in my room around 3 .. folks coming in and out i dont know who visited me who didnt .. i remember burhan salah turki and thats it .. my mom said your brothers were here :S oh really “salmy 3leehom” .. got fully generated by like 6 pm .. andthen went back to sleep
day 3 leaving hell:
its 1 am got online no one was there … took my medication ate like a horse .. their food sucks .. then slept and just woke up its 6 am now .. i’m in my room a male nurse just walked in .. he wants to see the screws :S .. FUCK OFF im trying to get some sleep (liar) .. ass hole .. ..(BOWING) thank you thank you every one .. yea i know thank you .. i made it .. oh oh let me check if they got any else other than the screws .. no they are there .. oh oh my grandma got her kidneys stolen let me check on mine .. hefhefhefhefhef they are their no scars 
the old indian bitch came again i gave her the look (beat it BITCH!) hehehe and she left she can hear me talking to my self .. another fat kind philipino nurse .. she dont know how to use the glocometer :S .. im in hell .. i taught her how, she was touching me and mom was @@| .. relax mom im not marrying her .. doctor dropped by minute ago he is gonna discharge me in few minutes .. so i walked out pissed at the slow fuck he told e its gonna take 3 working days for paper to go from different department to another in the same building to sign my sick leave .. the only thingcheered me up was the fat kind philipino nurse .. she was waving bye bye habeeebi and i was like .. lose some weight and i’ll consider youooooo, bye bye wa a7amatu allah wa baraktu
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